t minus two months

Dear Friends,

If today is really the 30th of October, then I am really leaving in two months. Like, to the day. Freaky. Exactly what I'm doing hasn't sunk in quite yet. I mean, my mind has grasped the fact that I am actually leaving, but it still hasn't occurred to my sleep-deprived brain what I'm leaving for. I'll get there. At this point I'm just trying to not panic about all the things I still have to do and get and take care of. A very daunting thing, moving away for an undisclosed amount of time. I'm not the first to do it, and I certainly won't be the last, I know, but I still have found myself getting sucked into my dread. It was actually my mum who mentioned that I needed to make the most of the time I have left, rather than allow myself to sink into this petrified stupor. Very sound advice. And I'm working on it, truly I am, but there are still those moments when I wish I could curl up in my closet to hide from the world like I did when I was a little girl.

This is silly. I refuse to overthink this (more than I already have, that is.) My exile to a beautiful and far off country is self-imposed and, quite frankly, necessary. I can't wait to step off the plane and get a taste of what awaits me half a world away! I've managed to obtain most of the key things I need this past weekend on a foray into the outlets of North Conway: a fabulously waterproof Marmot jacket (thank you Dee-Dee) and a windproof fleece vest (thank you Mum), in addition to some clothing that will be up to the challenge of fashionable world travel. There's no much left to do at this point- physically speaking, that is. Mentally we still have a ways to go. But my impending adventure is definitely the blindingly bright spot on my horizon- so bright it's kind of hard to see anything else. I guess it's a good thing I have such excellent sunglasses.

*Olivia

"I am not an adventurer by choice but by fate." - Vincent Van Gogh

t minus three months

Dear Friends,

This being my first blog entry, I would like to officially welcome you (and myself) to the site and thank you for having a look-see! No doubt by this time you have gotten tired of hearing about me moving to New Zealand, but unfortunately you'll find talk of little else on this blog. Consider yourselves warned.

Today is October the 7th, which means that in exactly THREE MONTHS I will arrive in Nadi, Fiji before heading on to Auckland on the 11th. When I first got my visa and plane ticket in July I felt like January would never get here, but all of a sudden I feel like it's coming up almost faster than I can deal with. Moving is expensive! In addition to buying the international cell phone and the luggage and the sexy new (hot pink) camera, I'm also having to invest in something I've never had to buy before: outdoor clothing. Like, waterproof things and really hardcore sunglasses and moisture-wicking shirts... It seems like the list is never-ending. But I know I'll be glad of it when I'm there.

I still can't believe I'm Doing it- I feel like I've made so many plans before this and none of them have worked out for one reason or another. But this one just felt so Right to me. And part of the reason I bought a one way, non-refundable plane ticket was so that I couldn't back out of it, I couldn't lose my nerve, I couldn't find any excuses to not take the plunge. This way I had no choice. I'm free of this static rut I've gotten into, I'm making myself Stop Planning everything, and I'm getting in touch with my inner beatnik. Go me.

Despite the manifold attractions of this plan, however, I am having an emotional quandary which is making it difficult to be care-free. In three months I leave my family for an unknown duration of time (remember the one-way ticket thing?) and, as it turns out, that's kinda tough. My family is getting along for the first time in... well, for the first time in forever, really, and here I go moving 10,000 miles away. So it's going to be hard. But I'm still leaving and I'm going to throw myself whole-heartedly into the most amazing adventure of my life. So far.

I'll just make sure to wear waterproof mascara at the airport.

*Olivia

"Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen.

Keep in the sunlight." - Benjamin Franklin